Whether you are considering a return home due to lack of employment, or because you simply miss loved ones and the familiarity of the town, moving back to your hometown can be both exciting and difficult. You may resent the connotation that moving back home means you aren't progressing or that you have failed to make it on your own. On the other hand, you may have been lonely and homesick living elsewhere. There's plenty of ways to successfully move back to your hometown as an adult.
Whatever the case for your trek back home, this guide will provide you with a few tips on settling in, finding a job, reconnecting with your old crowd, and dealing with those overbearing parents if you are forced to return the nest.
Reconnect with old friends before moving back
One of the biggest perks about returning to your hometown neighborhood is seeing all the friends you left behind. When we move away from loved ones and start new life elsewhere, longing for close relationships is the hardest part of settling in. If you are planning to return, the nostalgic memories of the good times you had with your pals will likely be one of the things you are anticipating the most.
- Before you return, contact with your old buddies with a phone call or even a Facebook message to let them know you are back in town. This way, they will know that you were thinking about them prior to your return -- not just once you were back in town and feeling bored.
- Arrange a big gathering at a local pub so that people will not feel pressured to RSVP or commit to attending. It will give the affair a more casual atmosphere that won't intimidate friends you haven't spoken to in a while.
- Ask your old friends to bring along new significant others or people you'd like to get to know. This will give you a chance to widen your circle.
If you haven't kept in touch with your friends much since you have left, you may feel anxious about reconnecting with them. What if they are resentful or feel as if you have forgotten about them? Stay calm and be honest. Once you are all together, you will relive memories and swap stories about what you have been up to since they last you were together.
Visit favorite spots when you move back
There are likely many places you have missed while you were away, such as favorite bars, restaurants, parks and shops. A great way to celebrate your return home is to spend some quality time enjoying these spots by yourself.
- Get a drink at your local pub
- Ride your bike along the old trail down the block
- Walk along the main strip downtown to window-shop
- Drink an espresso at your favorite cafe
The many memories you treasure that are connected to these places will fill you with nostalgic comfort and make you excited about your return. Re-experiencing everything that made you love and miss your hometown, and maybe what influenced your decision to move back, will be the perfect way to welcome yourself back home.
Contact former employers before you move back
Depending on why you are returning home, you may have to look for a job. Even if you are now in a different industry than you were before you left town, it might be a good idea to snag some temporary employment at your old job while you search for other career options.
While you may be tempted to just shoot your old boss an email with your resume, it may be much more effective to stop in the office or establishment to drop it off in person. Your employer is more likely to remember you if they can put a face to name, rather than read an impersonal email.
- Include positive references from jobs you held while you were away
- Explain the reasons for the move back home -- as honestly as possible
- Keep an optimistic attitude when discussing your decision to come back
If you are enthusiastic, your boss won't think of your inquiry for work as part of a temporary transition period and may be more likely to offer you a job.
Make moving back in with your parents bearable
Returning to your hometown may not be under the most optimum conditions. Perhaps you were laid off, can no longer afford to live alone or found no job opportunities after college graduation. Moving back into your parents home after a period of independence is never easy, but there are a few ways to make the time together as bearable as possible.
- Contribute by paying a single household bill, such as the cable or the groceries each week. Tackling the household chores is also a great way to show your appreciation for the room and board.
- Save money with frugal spending habits. The more money you save, the faster you will be able to get back on your feet. Additionally, if your parents see you going out frequently and spending carelessly, this can fuel resentment and make for an unhappy household.
- Remember that this is no reason to be ashamed. It is unlikely that your parents are disappointed in you, or view you as a failure or a mooch for returning to the nest. As long as you are not holed up in your room all day watching television, they will realize that you are doing your best to find employment and get back on your feet.
- Snag a job as soon as you can -- even if it's not your dream position. It is more admirable to make some money while you search for a higher-paying, more desirable job than to sit on your couch in your pajamas all day waiting to be offered a position coveted by hundreds of other hopefuls.
- Establish some boundaries. Returning to your parents home as an adult can be awkward and complicated. The best way to resolve any issues is to sit down with your parents and talk it out. As long as you are working (or actively seeking employment) and contributing to the household (financially or through chores), explain to your parents that you would like some privacy and independence -- especially if you have become accustomed to it while you were away.